Two and a half years ago, Maggie Lambe — single and ready to reinvent herself after two back-to-back marriages — dove into the online dating world. Lambe had never downloaded dating apps before. But, having heard so much about them, she decided to give the digital romance sphere a whirl. She hoped to find connection. Instead, she found frustration. “It was artificial,” Lambe said. “Another big issue was that conversations were so difficult going back and forth. You might hear something, and then two days later, a follow-up.”

The experience — dismal as it was — was pivotal, she said. Lambe, who also owns and operates a personal concierge service, decided to create a meetup in Santa Fe, which soon became Local Singles. It began as a once-per-month gathering of 15, and now involves five to 10 socials per month and nearly 2,000 members. The focus is on in-person connection — something Lambe said people are eager for in the ultra-digital, isolated age. “It’s about creating meaningful conversations, connections,” Lambe said. “I mean, there’s nothing like talking to someone face-to-face and really getting to know them the way, really, we should.”

How it works

Local Singles socials take place mostly at local upscale bars, parks or coffee shops. Some intentionally restrict the number of attendees to provide a more intimate atmosphere; some are directed specifically toward people in specific age brackets — 40 to 50, 50 to 60 and 70 plus.

Attendance ranges from 12 to 200 people, depending on the event.

Everyone who walks into a social is first invited to fill out a name tag. First-time guests are given a red dot to indicate their newbie status and invite regulars to “give them a warm welcome,” Lambe said. It’s free to RSVP for an event on the Local Singles website, though Lambe requests a $5 cover fee at the door. The events are open to people of all ages, but Lambe sees fewer people in the 20 to 30 range, she said.

“It’s more challenging for them to connect because they’re so used to communication through text,” she said. “So coming face-to-face can be a little more challenging.” Despite what their names might suggest, Lambe said Local Singles socials are largely about friendship.

Connections

She suggests every attendee have an open heart, rather than focusing on just one potential outcome.

“I consider myself a connector, bringing people together,” she said. “Whatever your journey is, whatever you’re looking for is the path you create. I just bring you together.”

‘Sense of camaraderie’

Linda Ingraham, a Santa Fe artist, said through the group she has made lots of friends who hang out outside of the socials. She first attended a Local Singles social about two years ago, and she’s been going ever since. “What keeps me coming back is the sense of community, sense of camaraderie,” Ingraham said. “And just having a really good time with no pressure.” Her favorite socials are those that involve dancing, she said. A DJ dance party and (optional) wig night is scheduled at The Mystic in April. Ingraham also likes that the events are held at venues she would not normally go by herself, she said. “It introduces me to new places,” Ingraham said. “It gets me introduced to new people.”

For Lambe, the venue is just as important as the other aspects of a social. It’s important to pick a place with a good atmosphere, she said.

Her most recent social was held at Bishop’s Lodge. Her big Valentine’s Day event was at a ballroom in La Posada.

Finding love

Heather Gwaltney, who owns a company called Center for Mindful Business, helps Lambe with social media for Local Singles. But her involvement with the group began after she moved to Santa Fe from Washington, D.C., about a year and a half ago.

The first time she went to a social, it didn’t feel romantic, Gwaltney said. By the next time she went, she had cleared her expectations and started enjoying herself. Then, at her fourth and fifth social, Gwaltney met a man. Lambe had set up a bingo-like game where everyone got a sheet of paper and had to grab peoples’ answers to a list of questions. “I went up to him and asked him about what he was most passionate about, and he said his kids, and then we just kind of stuck together,” Gwaltney said.

The pair — and his three dogs — now live together in Peña Blanca.

​

In small ways and big, Gwaltney said, Lambe makes it a point to give back to the community.

“She’s not making any money off of this, but she’s cultivating relationships, and it’s booming,” Gwaltney said.

Lambe recently launched a new initiative on her website called “Promote You.” This space allows Local Singles members to showcase their businesses or services with the community, providing short biographies and contact information or links to their own sites.

In December, she held a silent auction to fundraise for Kitchen Angels. Local businesses and what Lambe calls her “singles community” donated items and cash, and they raised $5,500 in one night.

“I’m not just connecting singles, but supporting the outside community here,” she said.